Guide to Canadian Weather

[minstrel]

Canadian Temperature Guide

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Canadians plant gardens.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
Italian cars won't start.
Canadians drive with the windows down.

32° Fahrenheit (0° C)
American water freezes.
Canadian water gets thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
Canadians have the last barbecue of the season.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
Canadians Girl Guides sell cookies door to door.

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Ottawa canal opens for skating.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
Ethyl alcohol freezes.
Canadians get grumpy when they can't thaw the keg.

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
Absolute zero: all atomic motion stops.
Canadians start saying, "Cold, eh?".

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Leafs win the Stanley Cup.

[carju1]

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Leafs win the Stanley Cup.

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????

Julian

[minstrel]

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????
Julian, Julian, Julian...

You can get hockey or Homer Simpson or beer (and by "beer" mik means "ale) into ANY conversation...

[Greyhawk]

With The leafs being such a great team they can fit into any topic.

Greyhawk

[labrynth_of_fire]

Ill have to rememer that if I go to canada! lol

[minstrel]

With The leafs being such a great team they can fit into any topic.
...and by "The Leafs", Greyhawk, of course, means "The Senators" and/or "The Canadiens".

[matauri]

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????

Coz they manage to get it into ANY conversation!!

They have this little time frame happening over there...

3 months spent talking about whether the Leafs or The Sens are gonna be the team to watch that year.

4 months spent blow harding about which IS proving to be the better team

2 months braggin about takin the cup away from the US & reminding them that they invented hockey after all!

3 months bagging their own teams, the refs, and anyone else who could remotely have had anything to do with Canada not winning the Cup ;-)

12 months boasting that Wayne Gretzky is a Canadian! :-)


;-)

Cindy

[minstrel]

Yeah.... :-)

Sweet, eh?

And we also have baseball and football (not the crappy Canadian version - NFL!).

Whereas, in Oz they have.... err... hmmm... rugby and croc thumping? well, I guess soccer when they get tired of watching grass grow in the outback... oh and also basketball! no wait... wrong continent... well, rugby and croc thumping anyway... :-)

Oh! and beer (by which they mean anything wet and alcoholic, like ale...)

:-)

[matauri]

oh and also basketball! no wait... wrong continent

Heyyyy...we have basketball !! NBA! And we export!

Luc Longley - the Bulls, the Lakers, Timberwolves & the Suns.

Andrew Gaze - the Bullets & the Spurs

Mark Bradtke - the 76'ers

Chris Anstey - the Mavericks & the Bulls

Shane Heal - the Timberwolves


The Boomers coming 4th in 2000 Olympics.

A silver medal in the womans basketball at 2000 Olympics.


Wrong continent indeed !! ;-)


Cindy

[carju1]

Luc Longley - the Bulls, the Lakers, Timberwolves & the Suns.

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)

Julian.

[matauri]

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)
Cute Julian me dear...cute :-)

;-)

Cindy

[carju1]

Cute Julian me dear...cute :-)

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.

Nah she must have meant that Luc Longley was cute :)

Julian

[Greyhawk]

David you forgot about Ausie rules football. Which I have to say knocks the NFL way out of any compitition, and is just a little bit better then the CFL (which is miles ahead of NFL ... Talk about being proud Canadian eh?). Even Hockey isn't really a sport. If you have to wear pads it isn't a sport.

Greyhawk

[matauri]

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.

LOL...and because I am such a nice person...I will let you live with that dillussion ;-)



Cindy

[mikmik]

We'll now, Les Habitant may not be the best team at this precise century in time, but they do have one very important association going for them, they are sort of named after a brand of beer. And by beer, I mean 'not really ale'*, but much better than aftershave as a refreshment.



*This once only.

[minstrel]

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.
I thought she was referring to the hat... and, for the record, I don't believe she ever called you normal... ;-)

[minstrel]

Well now, Les Habitants may not be the best team at this precise century in time, but they do have one very important association going for them, they are sort of named after a brand of beer. And by beer, I mean 'not really ale'*, but much better than aftershave as a refreshment.
"...'E's 'aving a go at aftershave now!" - Monty Python's Life of Mikmik.

[minstrel]

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)
Matauri, having finally lost all patience with him, grabs her Xena the Warrior Princess sword and makes a lung at El Carju, but, due to a slight miscalculation in windspeed, impales his hat and swallows another 'roo...

[matauri]

Matauri, having finally lost all patience with him, grabs her Xena the Warrior Princess sword and makes a lung at El Carju, but, due to a slight miscalculation in windspeed, impales his hat and swallows another 'roo...

Having the flu hasnt slowed you down has it! ;-)



Cindy

[minstrel]

Having the flu hasn't slowed you down has it!
Thanks for asking!

Actually, (1) it's a good excuse to play here instead of working, and (2) I think I'm starting to win the battle against the bug :-)

[mikmik]

One of my old bosses (from my baking days, circa 1994) used to say to me every Tueswday morning
Hi mikmik!* Glad to see you're feeling better. Was that the 'flu' or the 'a flu to many' virus?



* Names have been changed to protect the 'innocent', and by innocent, we mean "guilty, but naive"

[rocky1]

Actually, (1) it's a good excuse to play here instead of working, and (2) I think I'm starting to win the battle against the bug :-)



And, 3.) The cold medication gives you a good excuse for such delusional rambling! Not?

[minstrel]

And, 3.) The cold medication gives you a good excuse for such delusional rambling!
It's true!

"I have got to lay off the cough syrup... seriously, dude... I'm worried about me..." - paraphrased from Eric Cartman

[mikmik]

1 -
And, 3.) The cold medication gives you a good excuse for such delusional rambling! Not?Can't remember the guy's name,it has been a while since I saw him around here, but he should be at least an MVP, if not a level jumper!

2 -
It's true!

"I have got to lay off the cough syrup...
Frankly, minstrel, I am appalled by your lack of hospitality. You haven't seen rocky1 for ages, and when you do, you can't even offer him the first swig outta a fresh bottle? The least you could do is pour him a stien of vintage dextro- mathorphan or two!

3 -Hey everybody!! Flaming Moes on minstrel, I'll get the next round! Get 'em while they're hot!

[mikmik]

carjul wrote
If you annoy me you'll only get de-caf in The Break Room
And by de-caf, he means "Lite" ale....

[rocky1]

Can't remember the guy's name, it has been a while since I saw him around here, but he should be at least an MVP, if not a level jumper!


Serious case of writer's block of late! Have been trying to dream up new stories for the Editorial Section of the website, and drawing a total blank, having vented all the insanity I can muster here chasing Jell-O and ghosts and such! Backed off to try and regain focus on creativity. On the second issue... I'm lookin for another picture already!