People Skills

[wenwilder]

I ran across this in my son's school papers and thought I'd pass it along.



The most important skills a child or adolescent can develop are people skills. Business managers throughout the country commonly list people skills as the most desired trait for prospective employees. People skills are developed at an early age and cultivated throughout life. Although this list is very basic, it is an invaluable tool in human behavior.

1. Before you say anything to anyone, ask yourself three things. 1.) is it true; 2.) is it kind; 3.) is it Necessary.
2. Make promises sparingly and keep them faithfully.
3. Never miss the opportunity to compliment or say something encouraging to or about someone.
4. Refuse to talk negatively about others; don't gossip and don't listen to gossip.
5. Have a forgiving view of people. Believe that most people are doing the best they can.
6. Keep an open mind; discuss, don't argure.
7. Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing or saying anything that could make matters worse.
8. Let your virtues speak for themselves.
9. If someone criticizes you, see if there is any truth to what he/she is saying; if so, make changes. If there is not truth to the criticism, ignore it and live so that no one will believe the negative remarks.
10. Cultivate your sense of humor; laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
11. Do not seek so much to be consoled, as to console; do not seek so much to be understood, as to understand; do not seek so much to be loved, as to love.

Is there anything you think might be missing?

[matauri]

7. Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing or saying anything that could make matters worse.

My personal favourite to a degree! Sometimes counting to a thousand just doesn't work. So when I really have to bite my tongue I think about sex. Dont laff ! Thinking about a sexy individual is the best splash of cold water when ya feelin really peeved. Though I do concede...it could be that individual that got you aggitated in the first place. Then you just think of someone else! ;-)

But I wouldn't recommend teaching that to school kids! ;-)



Cindy

[mikmik]

Seek not to fantasize, but to be fantasized about!

The saint must be 'Spinning'!

I find a walk is my favourite. Use my feet for what they are intended, before I can get one wedged in my mouth. Getting out of the situation helps me keep things in perspective, and I'm in fantastic shape!

[Greyhawk]

Walk softly and carry a big stick.

Oh no forget it that is the US foriegn policy.

What about "And it harm none do what you will"

Greyhawk

[redcircle]

7. Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing or saying anything that could make matters worse.


My buddy at work has a 30second rule with his girlfriend. He tries to think about what he is going to say for 30seconds before he says it. Keeps him out of the dog house. Sometimes I have to remind him when I overhear his conversations with her. lol

[wenwilder]

7. Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing or saying anything that could make matters worse.


My buddy at work has a 30second rule with his girlfriend. He tries to think about what he is going to say for 30seconds before he says it. Keeps him out of the dog house. Sometimes I have to remind him when I overhear his conversations with her. lol

My problem is, I say what I'm thinking before I think what I'm saying - even happens when I'm typing, imagine that? ;)

People skills truly are necessary though, you can't artfully antagonize someone unless they first think you're a 'nice' person. :)

[mikmik]

Greyhawk reminds me that
What about "And it harm none do what you will"

Yes, my spirituality motto "do what you will, and if it harm one, snivel and grovel 'till forgiveness is done" (apologies to wiccans)

It is easier to beg forgiveness than to ask permission. 'pretty sure I didn't think that up -mikmik 2003'

Redcircle and wen: I find that 30 sec. of thought is what gets me in trouble - just long enough to come up with a really good one. I best be sticking to the lo-o-o-o-n-n-n-g-g-g walks.

wen =
People skills truly are necessary though, you can't artfully antagonize someone unless they first think you're a 'nice' person. :)
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer?
It's gettin' so's you can't trust your enemies OR your friends.

[minstrel]

People skills truly are necessary though, you can't artfully antagonize someone unless they first think you're a 'nice' person.
Yikes! This suggests a level of planning hitherto unsuspected in Wen, rivaling that of a war room.

Time to remind y'all of two more quotes:

(1) "Hell hath no fury like a woman. Period."

(2) "Men are from here... Women are from way the hell over there..."

[wenwilder]

Yikes! This suggests a level of planning hitherto unsuspected in Wen, rivaling that of a war room.


Here I thought I told you that I don't play well with others? Guess I was talkin' to them there ghosts again. Or was it the Jello? ;)

It is amazing to me how many people don't see people skills as being important, until they deal with people all day. Then they wish everyone had them! :)

[Greyhawk]

Having spent years in the military, I have highly toned people skills. And in true gemini fashion I can be someone's best friend or worst nightmare. So my people skills are like Wen's, "It's my way or the Highway"

Greyhawk

[minstrel]

"Never trust a dog to watch your food." - Patrick, age 10

"When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' don't answer." - Hannah, 9

"Never tell your mom her diet's not working." - Michael, 14

"When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair". - Taylia, 10

"Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac." - Andrew, 9

"Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time." - Kyoyo, 9

"If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse." - Naomi, 15

"Felt markers are not good to use as lipstick." - Lauren, 9

"Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat." - Joel, 10

"When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone." - Alyesha, 13

"Never try to baptize a cat." - Eileen, 8

[minstrel]

"Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching." - Andrew, age 9

"Wear a hat when feeding seagulls." - Rocky, age 9

"Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning." - Stephanie, age 8

"Don't flush the toilet when your dad's in the shower." - Lamar, age 10

"Never ask for anything that costs more than $5 when your parents are doing taxes." - Carol, age 9

"Never bug a pregnant mom." - Nicholas, age 11

"Don't ever be too full for dessert." - Kelly, age 10

"Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do." - Hank, age 12

"Listen to your brain. It has lots of information." - Chelsea, age 7

"Stay away from prunes." - Randy, age 9

"Never dare your little brother to paint the family car." - Philip, age 13

"Forget the cake, go for the icing." - Cynthia, age 8

[Mili]

Two points here I can relate to:

1- I speak as I'm thinking and have been getting into less trouble as the years have gone by. Fortunately, I have a sixth sense (call it a survival instinct), to feel when other's eyes are boring through the back of my head. Then I'll instantly make the necessary amends to keep the peace.

2 - The 30 second pause ... kind of 7 heartbeats too long, but during that time I will hug my hubby or kids as if it were the last time of my life. Then take a deep breath, and deal with the situation. If it's other people, then I'll briefly look away and give a 3-second gaze at a really nice object to compose my thoughts.

Exceptions? Don't everyone yell at the same time. I've never gotten used to lots of confusion.

(Fire sign Sagittarius, with ascendant in Scorpio. How's that for explaining the above!!!)

People skills are probably the best when they come natural. IMO.

- Mili -

[wenwilder]

1- I speak as I'm thinking and have been getting into less trouble as the years have gone by.

People skills are probably the best when they come natural. IMO.

- Mili -

Speech is a big part of people skills. Knowing what to say and how to say it really does matter. The people we most enjoy listening to (speakers, actors, News professionals, etc.) are generally well spoken. They also have their material written for them, but that's why speech writers make good money. :)

I would have to agree with you though, those who have natural people skills are the one's that people are naturally drawn too. It is possible that it is learned, but it truly seems to be "a part of" their personality.

They take the time to listen, they seem to know exactly what to say and when it needs said and it seems they have unending patience.

I think another large part of people skills is Never Judging or saying "I told you so." They allow people to be right or wrong in their eye's but realize that they are people and they have to make their own choices. I guess that would be #6 wouldn't it? :)

People are interesting to begin with with or without people skills. :)

One other thing Mili your comment: "I will hug my hubby or kids as if it were the last time of my life." I think that is GREAT! They did a study about touching and how important it is to our physical and mental well being. You are helping your family, and yourself by hugging them. You're an inspiration. :)