Thoughts While Thinking ... Add Your Own

wrmineo · #1 (**permalink**) 04-22-2005, 07:39 PM

Who was the cruel SOB who put an "s" in lisp; that's just wrong! :)

Add your own ....

JKomp · #2 (**permalink**) 04-22-2005, 07:50 PM

why make a word like dyslexia so hard to spell?

How come Jonathon Ross cant pronounce Rs, his last name is Ross, hasnt he had enough practice?

more to come watch this space...

wrmineo · #3 (**permalink**) 04-22-2005, 08:00 PM

If four out of five people suffer from diarreha, is that indicative that the fifth person is enjoying it ... eewww!

**mike** · #4 (**permalink**) 04-23-2005, 03:50 AM

If God dropped acid, would he see people?

JKomp · #5 (**permalink**) 04-23-2005, 06:32 AM

diarrhoea runs in the family ;)

wrmineo · #6 (**permalink**) 04-23-2005, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike

If God dropped acid, would he see people?

I have a sneaky suspicion that Mike is a very big Gary Larson (The Far Side) Fan! :)

Here's anohter thought while thinking:

Why do the drive up ATM machines have Braille? I'm sorry, but that scares me ....

esiegel · #7 (**permalink**) 04-25-2005, 10:41 AM

if you mail a helium balloon...does the post office owe you money?

if you fly in a super-sonic jet...can you only talk to the person sitting behind you?

if a car is taveling at the speed of light...and you flip on the headlights...will they do anything?

JKomp · #8 (**permalink**) 04-25-2005, 11:59 AM

Mailing helium balloons used to be my primary source of income, now the post office says that they will be taking size of package into account - what's a guy to do, you cant have negative size, can you?

**mike** · #9 (**permalink**) 04-25-2005, 03:07 PM

Should the crematorium offer discounts to burn victims?

**JMuncy** · #10 (**permalink**) 04-25-2005, 03:28 PM

Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

just don't make sense...

vm2902 · #11 (**permalink**) 04-26-2005, 08:38 AM

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?

Chris · #12 (**permalink**) 04-26-2005, 06:09 PM

if firefighters fight fire, do freedom fighters fight freedom?

and (a little off-topic, but i do wonder about this)

exactly what muscle do fireflies flex to make their a$$ light up? i've tried and tried but to no avail. ;)

eightfifteen · #13 (**permalink**) 04-26-2005, 06:20 PM

"What if 'C-A-T' really spelled 'dog'?"

-Ogre
Revenge of the Nerds 2: Nerds in Paradise

KeithO · #14 (**permalink**) 04-26-2005, 06:37 PM

Please tell me why we had an administration constructed of a rough-around-the-edges Bush, crooked Dick, and a dark brown Colin?

**JMuncy** · #15 (**permalink**) 04-27-2005, 11:22 AM

- If a person kills their clone, is it murder or suicide?

- How big is a jumbo-shrimp?

- What does the Q in Q-Tip stand for?

- Why is the Hooked on Phonics number 1-800-abcdefg? How are you supposed to call that if you can't read?

- Why do kamakazi pilots wear helmets

- How much money, in pennies, is lying in the streets of the world?

- Why do people look up when they think?

MarcieZoob · #16 (**permalink**) 04-28-2005, 08:20 PM

Now that most chalkboards in school are green, do you call it a blackboard or is it now a greenboard?

How can someone be pretty ugly? Are they pretty or are they ugly?

And what in the world is a working vacation? I know I don't want to take one...

ctabuk · #17 (**permalink**) 04-29-2005, 05:58 AM

In the UK we play cricket, each team has eleven players. The first two go 'out' to bat and while they are playing they are 'in'. If one looses his wicket he is 'out' and the next player comes 'out' so that he can be 'in'. The other team's job is to be out in the field and try to get the players who are 'in' - 'out' and the players who are 'in' try not to get 'out', by staying 'in'. When the first team are all 'out' the team who were 'out' in the field go 'in', and then come 'out'and try to get the players who are 'in' 'out'. Clear enough?
Johnathon Ross is a UK Comic who cannot pronounce his 'r's - imagine him in a garden nursery trying to buy a Rhododendron !

**JMuncy** · #18 (**permalink**) 04-29-2005, 10:38 AM

- Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

- Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

- If you play a blank cassette, can a mime hear it?

- Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

- What was the best thing before sliced bread?

- Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

- Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

KeithO · #19 (**permalink**) 04-29-2005, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jmuncy

- Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

- Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

- If you play a blank cassette, can a mime hear it?

- Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

- What was the best thing before sliced bread?

- Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

- Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Those are deep!

ctabuk · #20 (**permalink**) 05-03-2005, 08:34 AM

Why is Australia the most unlikey spot to host a Nativity Play?
Answer, Try finding a virgin and a wiseman.

wrmineo · #21 (**permalink**) 05-11-2005, 11:27 PM

Who was the moron that decided to call the stop and go aggravation of traffic "Rush Hour" - I'm going nowhere fast!

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