Terraform Mars

jawn_tech · #1 (**permalink**) 12-03-2004, 10:31 PM

For those of you who are true fellow nerds, this is for you. It's been discussed by space program scientists about possibly terraforming Mars. Theoretically, I think it can be done. But should we? I hope we do, soon.

Here's my thoughts about it.

I've heard about melting the icy polar caps by spreading a black soot over them. The black would act as a solar conductor and warm the caps to melt, thus releasing oxygen into the atmosphere.

There is bacteria that thrives in sulfur. The atmosphere is a sulfuric compound. The by-product when sulfur is consumed by the bacteria is CO2 (carbon dioxide). The CO2 would have a greenhouse warming effect on the planet. Introduce plants, and they would thrive in the CO2, and as we all know they create oxygen.

Colonate Mars with people. But also, Mars could be a place to introduce genetically altered ("improved") plants and animals for farming. Since some of the population here is opposed to introducing genetically altered plants/animals to the population -- thus the chance of them dominating nature / upsetting the balance in the ecosystem, having a place on Mars would not upset the balance, as the ecosystem would be just developing.

ctabuk · #2 (**permalink**) 12-04-2004, 08:17 AM

'Doctor Otto Van Clopenheimer, is that you?'
'Yah, it is I'
'It's me Doctor Gladstone from London, I e-mailed you the threads from jawn_tech, did you read them?'
'Yah, with great interest,the man is obsessed with the moon and Mars, does he eat a great deal of chocolate?'
'We do not know, but does he know more than he should?'
'Ah, my thoughts also, he has not mentioned the stargate in his threads but I think he may have found one'
'You mean there could be more than the one we use for witness protection?'
'Well, the one on Mars had more than 2 Earth dials, so it is possible, I think the FBI and the CIA would be advised to keep an eye on friend jawn_tech'
'Shall we keep bugging the WPW through that dubious character ctabuk, the man is clearly an idiot'
'Yah, I have never read worse threads on WPW he needs to be locked away, or even better placed in our stargate and sent to Mars'
'I agree, a fitting end'
'The colony on Mars, how large is it now?'
'Well as you know the atmosphere on Mars is Carbon Dioxide, so we lost a few who could not adapt'
'How many did we lose?'
'Ah, those who were planting the forest of Wood E, maybe a few thousand, they could not keep their peckers up, Wood E Wood Peckers we called them -
But the good news is they have been breeding like rabbits, there are tens of thousands of them now, it's like Australia all over again, but we do not let them plant willow, there will be no cricket on Mars'
'Do you think that jawn_tech should be placed in an Institution for his own good?'
'No, he is already in the WPW, he has suffered enough, he needs a holiday, maybe if he rests over Christmas he will feel better, even if he has found a stargate the odds of him being able to use are billions to one, no let the FBI and the CIA keep an eye on him, he should get better, it is this ctabuk that we have to deal with. Has anyone got any ideas with what to do with him?'

jawn_tech · #3 (**permalink**) 12-05-2004, 05:21 AM

They'll find a stargate on Mars. I think Stonehedge is a stargate of sorts. I bet it worked with black holes.

Here's an idea for helping the world rid itself of nukes. Have a contest to see who can hit the moon. It would make history the day we blew that sucker up.

ctabuk · #4 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 06:58 AM

Well I've started already, but I can't see it during the day, what am I doing wrong?

Now jawn_tech, taking soot to Mars, so have I got this right, we burn down a few forests, gather all the soot and dust, load it onto Thunderbirds 1 to 20,000,000,000,000, and fly the stuff to Mars, colonise it, and in the mean time blow up the moon and destroy the earth?

I think you need help, nice guy, no question about that. (under no circumstance will ctabuk creep to a Mod) But I do think Christmas cannot come quickly enough for you, lie down and rest.

globalhostinggroup · #5 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jawn_tech

They'll find a stargate on Mars. I think Stonehedge is a stargate of sorts. I bet it worked with black holes.

Here's an idea for helping the world rid itself of nukes. Have a contest to see who can hit the moon. It would make history the day we blew that sucker up.

You won’t find it I hid it too well…

What happens if the rocket doesn’t make it and u-e’s back to earth??

ctabuk · #6 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 11:10 AM

That's easy to answer, jawn_tech is on Mars, so he will sit back with a martini and see the biggest firework display ever

globalhostinggroup · #7 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 11:18 AM

Well I’m all for Mars
My great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grand kids have to live somewhere after we kill this place

ctabuk · #8 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 11:31 AM

Yeah, and supposing jawn_tech turns out to weigh 500llbs and is 7'6", he is a Moderator, he's probably doctored his photo to make himself look a nice guy. You go to Mars and Pow, lights out! Think of somewhere else and quick!

globalhostinggroup · #9 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 11:47 AM

100 bill should cover it lol

ctabuk · #10 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 12:15 PM

Oh yes cleverclogs, and where will he cash it? Bank of Mars Inc? - Look, if you cannot be serious, and this is very very serious,then globalhostinggroup, you are going to get beaten up by a mad moderator, and no amount of bribery, hold on, what about those notes you print?, you might fool him with a Federation of Planets Bankers Draft, yeah, go for it!

globalhostinggroup · #11 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 12:23 PM

I was more referring to bushes funding plan to mine the moon and land a man on mars NASA is quite happy well parts of it anyway since this new funding will tear NASA from within well viable departments will be slashed to make way for a man on mars.
My 100 bill is in reference to the projected budget to do this.

ctabuk · #12 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 12:31 PM

They have already mined the moon, what do you think those craters are? Besides that you tried to buy moonrocks from me before, and I've got loads left. No I reckon that unless we find a planet suitable to sustain at least 50 of Victoria's secret models and you and I then we are in the you know what!

Maximilian · #13 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 01:58 PM

On Mars, I would be considered a "guest" as the "5th Beatle".

Cheers!
Max

jawn_tech · #14 (**permalink**) 12-06-2004, 05:14 PM

Quote:

he's probably doctored his photo to make himself look a nice guy.

How did you uncover my evil plot to rule the world?

My plan would have worked if it wasn't for those Scooby kids.

ctabuk · #15 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 05:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maximilian

On Mars, I would be considered a "guest" as the "5th Beatle".

Cheers!
Max

With two dead, you would be the third. Look Max we have a serious problem here on WPW, jawn_tech is hell bent on world domination, look at the initials with the underscore, I'm amazed we didn't spot it before
Just
Awaiting
When
Nukes the underscore must be a code
Turn
Earth
Catastrophic
Hell

This guy sends shivers down my spine

globalhostinggroup · #16 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 09:42 AM

purplemonkeydishwasher sends shivers down my spine

ctabuk · #17 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 10:17 AM

I have just found out why, I'm not posting a direct reply

globalhostinggroup · #18 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 10:37 AM

Why you have to share….

ctabuk · #19 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by globalhostinggroup

Why you have to share….

I did and it got 'deleted' it's a gay forum!!!!!!!!!

greeneagle · #20 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 10:58 AM

Any persuasion of purple monkeys would probably not be considered as primary candidates!

Ken

globalhostinggroup · #21 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:03 AM

Ahhh there is always censorship
You have to code your messages
A = 01
B = 02
…
..
.

Then binary it
01 = 0001
02 = 0010
03 = 0011
…
..
.

So

Hi = 1000-1001

And if that is still a problem we will encrypt it :)

ctabuk · #22 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greeneagle

Any persuasion of purple monkeys would probably not be considered as primary candidates!

Ken

now that was witty, very quick, excellent post, I thought I was going to end up in the 'guest' box!

globalhostinggroup · #23 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:19 AM

Humm no one has got the purplemonkeydishwasher comment it is a vague reference to a pop media culture form a TV series.

greeneagle · #24 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:23 AM

My Rottweiller acts like a purple monkey whenever I try to give him a bath! I always take that spiked collar off first to avoid becoming mincemeat.

Ken

ctabuk · #25 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:27 AM

Search it on Google, any way back to World domination by you know who.

I just wonder how long it would take for life to go potty if the moon was given the old face lift treatment. Tides would be first, no more fish and chips, no more lobster, panic buying in the shops,(we get that at Christmas)then the old winds would get up. Electicity next, I suppose we could survive, but how many dead? Being serious for once.

greeneagle · #26 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 11:32 AM

ctabuk:
"I just wonder how long it would take for life to go potty if the moon was given the old face lift treatment. Tides would be first, no more fish and chips, no more lobster, panic buying in the shops.."

Just plain old cheese and I have lactose intollerance, talking about "going to potty"... I am being just as serious, I think.

Ken

wenwilder · #27 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 02:23 PM

Funny how the only ones talking about teraforming Mars is martians. ;)

globalhostinggroup · #28 (**permalink**) 12-07-2004, 02:53 PM

I suppose you would prefer Venus
The surface temperature of Venus is about 462 °C (about 736 K/864 °F)
Venus is the second planet from the sun. When viewed from a telescope Venus exhibits phases similar to that of the moon. Venus rotates on an axis like earth but slower and in a direction opposite Earth's. The atmosphere on Venus is comprised mostly of carbon dioxide (CO2) and a small percentage of the atmosphere is nitrogen. Venus has many clouds, which are made up of high concentrations of sulfuric acid.
Water and water vapor are extremely rare on Venus due to its high surface temperature that can approach 758 K (900 °F). This extreme temperature is caused by the greenhouse affect. As sunlight heats Venus' surface, the surface radiates infrared energy that is kept from escaping the planet by dense carbon dioxide atmosphere.
The atmospheric pressure on Venus is 90 times greater than that of the Earth. The surface of Venus is very mountainous and has many volcanoes, some of which are higher then Mt. Everest. The gravity on Venus is similar to that of Earth but the mass of the atmosphere would crush a person and the air on Venus is unbreathable.
Humm

Mars
The temperatures on the two Viking landers, measured at 1.5 meters above the surface, range from + 1° F, ( -17.2° C) to -178° F (-107° C). However, the temperature of the surface at the winter polar caps drop to -225° F, (-143° C) while the warmest soil occasionally reaches +81° F (27° C) as estimated from Viking Orbiter Infrared Thermal Mapper.

jawn_tech · #29 (**permalink**) 12-08-2004, 02:55 AM

Saddle up. Let's do it. Terraform that thing.

ctabuk · #30 (**permalink**) 12-08-2004, 06:29 AM

'President Bush?'
'Speaking'
'Thank you for taking my call'
'Ah,shucks Professor Otto Von Clopenheimer, I've always got time for you NASA boys, how can I help?'
'We have intercepted a thread from WebProWorld, we have found volunteers for the Mars Mission'
'Gee, that's great news,how many can we count on?'
'Well, there is one called jawn_tech who has been checked out by the CIA and the FBI,another called globalhostinggroup, a greeneagle'
'What, Big Chief GreenEagle of the 'wherethehellarewe'tribe? Gee, I thought we got him at the BigHorn?'
'I will check him out, there is one called wenwilder, I guess she could be related to Gene Wilder and we need solid characters for this mission, one called ctabuk'
'ctabuk? sounds like a Brit, he can defintely go, maybe take Cherrie Blair with him, Tony's ok, but she sucks!
'You may know these things, I am a humble scientist, but I can arrange that, but Mr President, they will be in Space for ten years, I need your permission to use the drug Xerophelopine, you know the anti aging one we tried on George Burns?'
'Permission granted, we will need our best pilots for this mission so I'll give Clint Eastwood, Tommy Lee Jones and Jimmy Garner a call, now I want you to keep bugging WPW and find out what they're up to, goodbye Professor'

globalhostinggroup · #31 (**permalink**) 12-08-2004, 10:49 AM

Please do not run CIA, FBI and Interpol scans on me I really want to go.

ctabuk · #32 (**permalink**) 12-08-2004, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by globalhostinggroup

Please do not run CIA, FBI and Interpol scans on me I really want to go.

Ah Heck! global, they just did, they searched on Globalhosting and got Global Warning, it should have been Global Warming, which is why you want to go to Mars, I'll tell you what I'll do, I'll get you the best seat on the flight, the one where you can see everything first, yes even before we do, on the bonnet or hood as you call it. We'll strap you in real tight, give you an air tube, goggles, no not googles, don't get excited, some warm boots, maybe cold to start with though,some tin foil and some toilet paper (your gonna need that fella)and off we go

globalhostinggroup · #33 (**permalink**) 12-08-2004, 01:05 PM

You have to use duct tape

ctabuk · #34 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wenwilder

Funny how the only ones talking about teraforming Mars is martians. ;)

Wen, are you using the stargate without jawn_tech knowing about it?

I think a nightclub would be great on Mars - on second thoughts would the atmosphere be good?

We could call it the globalhostinggroupdiscoramaandswingingsixtiesreviv alclub
it sort of trips of the tongue

globalhostinggroup · #35 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 09:18 AM

and two for one tuesdays
what would the cover charge be?

ctabuk · #36 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 09:25 AM

It's your club, my Christmas present, you can charge what you like

globalhostinggroup · #37 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 10:01 AM

well will it include the trip
without trip ahhh $100
ummm with trip $200000100 min 50 for this group rate

ctabuk · #38 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 10:10 AM

I have posted my cheque

MY CHEQUE

globalhostinggroup · #39 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 10:33 AM

I offer a 10% cash discount for cash up front.

ctabuk · #40 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 11:15 AM

OK, I'll rob a bank

globalhostinggroup · #41 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 11:18 AM

or two maybe 3 hehe

ctabuk · #42 (**permalink**) 12-09-2004, 11:27 AM

'Your Honour, I needed the money to pay globalhostinggroup for my trip to Mars, no I'm not being 'funny' as you put it, jawn_tech is planning to blow up the moon, yes your honour jawn_tech, yes THE MOON, no I am not mad, don't point your finger at me mate, What contempt? You'll be laughing on the otherside of your face when the Moon blows up and we the chosen few are on Mars,SIX MONTHS,you imbecile,TWELVE MONTHS, oh stick it up your ***, beam me up Scotty