Guide to Canadian Weather

minstrel · #1 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 07:49 PM

Canadian Temperature Guide

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Canadians plant gardens.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
Italian cars won't start.
Canadians drive with the windows down.

32° Fahrenheit (0° C)
American water freezes.
Canadian water gets thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
Canadians have the last barbecue of the season.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
Canadians Girl Guides sell cookies door to door.

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Ottawa canal opens for skating.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
Ethyl alcohol freezes.
Canadians get grumpy when they can't thaw the keg.

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
Absolute zero: all atomic motion stops.
Canadians start saying, "Cold, eh?".

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Leafs win the Stanley Cup.

carju1 · #2 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by minstrel

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Leafs win the Stanley Cup.

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????

Julian

minstrel · #3 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju1

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????

Julian, Julian, Julian...

You can get hockey or Homer Simpson or beer (and by "beer" mik means "ale) into ANY conversation...

Greyhawk · #4 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 09:57 PM

With The leafs being such a great team they can fit into any topic.

Greyhawk

labrynth_of_fire · #5 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 10:04 PM

Ill have to rememer that if I go to canada! lol

minstrel · #6 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyhawk

With The leafs being such a great team they can fit into any topic.

...and by "The Leafs", Greyhawk, of course, means "The Senators" and/or "The Canadiens".

matauri · #7 (**permalink**) 11-28-2003, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju

How did he manage to get hockey into this conversation ????

Coz they manage to get it into ANY conversation!!

They have this little time frame happening over there...

3 months spent talking about whether the Leafs or The Sens are gonna be the team to watch that year.

4 months spent blow harding about which IS proving to be the better team

2 months braggin about takin the cup away from the US & reminding them that they invented hockey after all!

3 months bagging their own teams, the refs, and anyone else who could remotely have had anything to do with Canada not winning the Cup ;-)

12 months boasting that Wayne Gretzky is a Canadian! :-)

;-)

Cindy

minstrel · #8 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 12:05 AM

Yeah.... :-)

Sweet, eh?

And we also have baseball and football (not the crappy Canadian version - NFL!).

Whereas, in Oz they have.... err... hmmm... rugby and croc thumping? well, I guess soccer when they get tired of watching grass grow in the outback... oh and also basketball! no wait... wrong continent... well, rugby and croc thumping anyway... :-)

Oh! and beer (by which they mean anything wet and alcoholic, like ale...)

:-)

matauri · #9 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 12:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by minstrel

oh and also basketball! no wait... wrong continent

Heyyyy...we have basketball !! NBA! And we export!

Luc Longley - the Bulls, the Lakers, Timberwolves & the Suns.

Andrew Gaze - the Bullets & the Spurs

Mark Bradtke - the 76'ers

Chris Anstey - the Mavericks & the Bulls

Shane Heal - the Timberwolves

The Boomers coming 4th in 2000 Olympics.

A silver medal in the womans basketball at 2000 Olympics.

Wrong continent indeed !! ;-)

Cindy

carju1 · #10 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 08:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matauri

Luc Longley - the Bulls, the Lakers, Timberwolves & the Suns.

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)

Julian.

matauri · #11 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)

Cute Julian me dear...cute :-)

;-)

Cindy

carju1 · #12 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matauri

Cute Julian me dear...cute :-)

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.

Nah she must have meant that Luc Longley was cute :)

Julian

Greyhawk · #13 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 10:29 AM

David you forgot about Ausie rules football. Which I have to say knocks the NFL way out of any compitition, and is just a little bit better then the CFL (which is miles ahead of NFL ... Talk about being proud Canadian eh?). Even Hockey isn't really a sport. If you have to wear pads it isn't a sport.

Greyhawk

matauri · #14 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.

LOL...and because I am such a nice person...I will let you live with that dillussion ;-)

Cindy

mikmik · #15 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 12:18 PM

We'll now, Les Habitant may not be the best team at this precise century in time, but they do have one very important association going for them, they are sort of named after a brand of beer. And by beer, I mean 'not really ale'*, but much better than aftershave as a refreshment.

*This once only.

minstrel · #16 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju1

Hope you all noticed that. I want it recorded Cindy called me cute :) Makes a change from the normal things she calls me.

I thought she was referring to the hat... and, for the record, I don't believe she ever called you normal... ;-)

minstrel · #17 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mikmik

Well now, Les Habitants may not be the best team at this precise century in time, but they do have one very important association going for them, they are sort of named after a brand of beer. And by beer, I mean 'not really ale'*, but much better than aftershave as a refreshment.

"...'E's 'aving a go at aftershave now!" - Monty Python's Life of Mikmik.

minstrel · #18 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matauri

Quote:

Originally Posted by carju

Wow he must be good to play for 4 teams all at once :)

Matauri, having finally lost all patience with him, grabs her Xena the Warrior Princess sword and makes a lung at El Carju, but, due to a slight miscalculation in windspeed, impales his hat and swallows another 'roo...

matauri · #19 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 02:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by minstrel

Matauri, having finally lost all patience with him, grabs her Xena the Warrior Princess sword and makes a lung at El Carju, but, due to a slight miscalculation in windspeed, impales his hat and swallows another 'roo...

Having the flu hasnt slowed you down has it! ;-)

Cindy

minstrel · #20 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matauri

Having the flu hasn't slowed you down has it!

Thanks for asking!

Actually, (1) it's a good excuse to play here instead of working, and (2) I think I'm starting to win the battle against the bug :-)

mikmik · #21 (**permalink**) 11-29-2003, 03:53 PM

One of my old bosses (from my baking days, circa 1994) used to say to me every Tueswday morning

Quote:

Hi mikmik!* Glad to see you're feeling better. Was that the 'flu' or the 'a flu to many' virus?

* Names have been changed to protect the 'innocent', and by innocent, we mean "guilty, but naive"