Hello,
You might try what mikmik said about installing under safe mode. With Win2kPro, make sure and use your task manager to verify what exactly is running on the system as well. I believe the IIS process will show up as inetinfo.exe (might be w3svc as well haven't used Win2k for a while), so if you stop the services and bring up the task manager and see this, they are still memory resident. It is best to end task (or close manually if possible) any task that is not system critical (or use safe mode) not just the systray icons as many resident programs do not necessarily put something there.
Another option (as mikmik pointed out in safe mode comments) is to copy the cd to the hd of the system and try it from there. Sometimes a cd read error could hose the update, without necessarily giving a cd read error -- and sometimes cds are just bad, so copying it first should give a better indication of the quality of the cd.
A few other thoughts: download the service pack, request a new cd, back-up, re-install win2k, update w/sp4
ASP/PHP errors - if after trying the update, you are now getting these errors it points to the w3svc/inetinfo maybe being memory resident during the update - if the sp is trying to update this (most likely for "security concerns" according to MS) it will not only fail the update, but it is going to mess up the IIS installation. ASP is native for IIS, PHP is an add-on....you may need to re-install IIS under windows components to get ASP back, and then reinstall PHP. (re-installing IIS components will most likely require you to setup PHP and all your ftp/www sites again, though the physical data should not be harmed)
Hope you get it figured out soon! Best of luck!
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